Letter to my brother, which is an angry letter

Last night I composed a letter to my brother on my little PDA, since my keyboard wasn't working, I had to use the stylus. It was slow going. Obviously I had some strong feelings or I wouldn't have tap tap tapped for the time it took.

Here is some of what I said. I had to get it out into concrete form, since I know I'll never be able to tell him this:

Dear Len,
I am so frustrated with you and how you are choosing to spend this part of your life. It began with you moving in with mom, while you are at the age when she should be moving in with you. An 85 year old woman shouldn't have the burden of her son and his Great (Sloppy and Dog Attacking creature) living in her tiny condominium.

It demonstrates to me her unconditional love for you, as well as your ability to take advantage of her. The whole time you were living there you complained about the things she did. She bitched about the dog messing up the house, she gave double messages, she took down her table. And you were so upset about it/

You were living there for FREE! Plus she had given you about 3 thousand dollars to get your belongings from Portland to Arizona, as well as helping you out with your declaration of bankruptcy papers/lawyer fees.
I have always know that you were her "favorite" and this has been demostrated to me througout our lives. You have taken advantage of this favoritism with jokes and use of her love. I admit I have been jealous of you getting the "Luskin recipe" birthday cake, while I either didn't get one at all, or maybe a box mix. I admit to jealousy of the "$50 checks" you inevitably received while I continued to get "$25".

It was both odd and painful. And when I finally confronted her about it in a letter, she finally gave me $50. And then complained about it to you.
It is sad, not because she couldn't afford the money for me, but because she didn't think that you and I would talk about it.

I was stunned when you talked to me about all the money she has tied up in stocks and investments. You were so angry that she had "all that money" and wouldn't give you any "to help you." That's her money, Len. She worked all her life, taking buses to work, neglecting her children, granted, but she worked hard as a Secretary in an organization that is known for treating it's employees like dog manure.

You haven't worked half the time she worked. You don't deserve her money. It is her money. She can set it on fire if she wants to do so. She has had to live with the death of our dad (who didn't leave her with much money, btw) the death of another three men who she cared for. That is alot of loss.

Where the hell is your compassion?

Now you are back where you started. You have met another "Sheila", are engaged, rather quickly I think after your divorce and end of your marriage, to a woman you don't really know.

How obnoxious are you about Deb? When you came to the wedding most of my friends thought that 1. You were a Marine and 2. You had nothing else to talk about except Deb.

You are living through other people, Len. You are NOT a Marine, Jake is the Marine. He feels a lot of pressure to take care of you and to be what you want him to be...Your buttons and hat and marine paraphenalia are not appropriate for the father of a soldier. I don't know any other marine parents who do this. (I speak from experience from being around many other parents of marines and other soldiers.)

And talking incessantly about Deb and her exercise program in a competitive way. Cousin Steve ran 5 mines. "Oh big deal, Deb runs 15 miles." I didn't see you running ANY miles while you were here...so 5 is pretty damned good.

That's it for now. I want to go on, but I'll save it for part II.

Your sister